March 27, 2016


Today is Easter and for the first year since The Husband and I bought our house, we are not hosting. We are going to my mother’s house instead. I am not bothered by this at all! All I have to do is bring dessert. No cleaning, no dishes, no food preparation. No washing dishes and cleaning after guests leave. None of it!

I took another FRER yesterday, because I had one more left, and the second line was there even quicker. And darker than the control line. So this is happening. For the most part I have felt more excited and happy than nervous. I don’t know why. After my experiences, I’ve gone 0-3 and struck out already,  you’d think I’d be nervous and scared and pessimistic. I’ve said many times that I lean towards pessimism more than optimism. But I just don’t feel that way right now. Sure, I’ve felt moments of fear when laying in bed at night. And I did consult Dr. Google a few days ago – and read an article that the chances of having a third NTD  is one in ten. I can’t remember where I read it, some scholarly article on the WHO website I think, so of course I felt a pang in my stomach. But the risk of having a third NTD is actually smaller than if The Husband and I are both carriers of some random disorder – the risk of the baby having the disorder is 25%, not the 10% of having a third NTD. Maybe I’m just grasping at straws and trying to find anything that makes me feel better about putting myself out there like this a fourth time.

Then I also wonder if I’ve done the “right thing” by switching up my vitamins. I have stuck with the Mega Food Baby & Me prenatal vitamin, but since I have to increase my intake of folate I have to buy that separately in additional to the prenatal. In the past I used Solgar Folate, but this time I switched it up to Life Extension Optimized Folate. I’m no expert on the differences between folic acid, and folinic acid, and folate and methylfolate. But based on what I’ve done my own “research” and based on what I’ve read I feel more comfortable taking the methylfolate. Then I wonder, what if 4mg is not enough? I’ve seen some articles recommend 4mg, and others recommend 5mg. So now that I know I am pregnant I have upped it to 5mg. The neural tube is supposed to fully close by the 28th day after conception – so, about 6 weeks pregnant. If this folate is supposed to help it close and prevent a NTD then I need to make sure I’m supplementing enough now. There’s no time to waste.

I don’t know if I have done enough. I hope I have.

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2 Responses to March 27, 2016

  1. G E says:

    I enjoy reading these posts – keep them coming!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I love that your going back and posting these! Its like, even though you were trying-ish.. it was still a nice surprise that it actually happened. And so fast! I’m SO SO SO happy for you that it all works out in the end and you finally have your take home, real life, living breathing loving baby. And I love that you mention this was a gift from your grandfather and your babies in heaven.

    Liked by 1 person

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