Odd Mother-To-Be Behaviors

In my current situation I am particularly sensitive to, and keenly aware of less than considerate, obnoxious or rude behavior from pregnant woman.

1 – My friend (acquaintance?) C, she of the group text hostage announcement, has NOT yet thanked me for the shower gift I sent her. Her shower was two months ago. I did not attend, but I still bought a card and sent her a Babies ‘R Us gift certificate. Sometimes I feel up to browsing other people’s registries and picking a gift to send to them. Sometimes I don’t, and you’re going to get a gift certificate because it’s easy and thoughtless and I don’t want to think about how you are having a baby and I am not. Either way you should be thankful that I sent you anything at all. Instead I am hearing CRICKETS from her. Chirp… chirp… chirp….

Not sending a “Thank you” is one of my biggest pet peeves. The Husband’s friend and his wife had their first baby in 2009. I went to the shower and we gave them a nice gift, as The Husband is the girl’s godfather. NEVER GOT A THANK YOU. I should get the child a Miss Manners etiquette book because her parents clearly aren’t going to teach her basic courtesy. Yes, it’s been  6 years and yes, I still remember. Petty? Maybe… but you could have just thanked me for the expensive gift I bought you.


2 – My pregnant friend (acquaintance?) J, she of the holiday card ultrasound announcement, is having her baby shower next month. I politely declined to her sister, who is hosting, and bought her something off her registry and had it shipped to her house. Nothing about the shower was a surprise so I wasn’t ruining anything by having it sent early, and on the gift message I apologized for not being mentally able to go. Fine. So this week I get a Facebook invitation to the shower from J herself! She set up the event and is saying things like “Thank you everyone who has already shopped on the registry! A lot of good things coming for my baby boy!” and “Don’t forget to have things shipped to my house instead of your house! It’ll be easier on shower day!” I already declined the invite once – sending it through Facebook is not going to change my RSVP status. It just caused me to decline a second time.

Is it just me or is this odd? I get wanting to be involved in planning your shower, but why are you personally setting up a Facebook event and sending Facebook invitations to the people that were already invited by mail? And why are you letting your guests know you are checking what they buy on the registry? Sure, you don’t know who bought what and lots of people probably check their registries, but do you need to comment on it? Keep your comments to yourself!


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14 Responses to Odd Mother-To-Be Behaviors

  1. mamajo23 says:

    The FB post is weird. Maybe she wants extra attention on it/ her?? I wish there was some button we could press to delete all pregnancy related things around us unless we deem them ok ( a sister, a fellow infertile, etc). But alas, it hasn’t been invented yet. A gal can dream though. Hugs.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Nara says:

    Argh! They sound like annoying people who would probably still be annoying whether they were pregnant or not. Also: I’ve noticed people hardly ever say thank you! It’s so annoying. I get stuff for my brother’s kids all the time and rarely get a thank you. I got a thank you for the Christmas presents the other week… About 8 weeks after Christmas! It’s really odd. Poor you!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. When I was a kid my mom made us send thank you cards to our family for christmas and birthday presents we received, but she made it fun (i.e. we drew in them) and it’s something that is just part of who I am. I believe it is respectful and a basic courtesy. So, I too despise people who don’t send thank you cards! Worst case scenario, my theory is late is better then never.
    And the facebook invite. Weird. You already declined, she knows you can’t attend. It makes no sense to me.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Okay…so situation #1- I loathe when people dont send thank you’s for stuff like this! So rude! I never forget either. As far as situation #2, thats just tacky in my opinion. Seriously?

    Liked by 1 person

  5. jivf says:

    I don’t get how people don’t send thank you notes! I thought maybe I’m just judgy and petty for being resentful for not getting a TY for thoughtful gifts. Even an email or text is better than nothing! The FB situation is just wrong. She shouldn’t be advertising the event herself. It’s obnoxious and has a “Gimme!” vibe.

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Totally annoying. I think we both need some new friends/acquaintances!
    People are totally self absorbed yes but sometimes I feel some go an extra step to rub it in! Hope I am wrong…

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Lol @ the e-card. So true. and #2! I had the exact exact same thing happen to me. I am still baffled by it.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. countyourselfunlucky says:

    Bets on her child(ren) not sending thank you notes for gifts they receive either when they are old enough. Her behaviour is not acceptable especially because you didn’t go to the shower so she couldn’t thank you in person at the time.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Maternally Optimistic says:

    The not sending of thank you’s is one of my pet hates!!! I am alwasy so angry at this. When my husbands close friend had his first child I bought a really expensive gift and never received a thank you so when they had their second and third child I didn’t go to much effort with the gifts. Still no thank you for any of them. When I started to think back about it I am pretty sure we didn’t get a thank you for their wedding gift.It really irritates me. I remember as a child after birthdays my mum making me sit down and write thank you notes to poeple who gave me gifts and then as I got older and it wasn’t so cute to write it in crayon I alwasy phoned everyone to thank them. That has definitely followed me into adult life and I think it is such bad manners not to say thank you.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. sbach1222 says:

    Sounds like someone is focused on getting as many gifts as she can! Who cares if they send them to their own house to wrap and bring to the shower? I don’t think you are going to need that high chair between now and the shower. It is irritating.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. I’m a stickler about thank you’s–I always send them, and I expect to receive them. But often I am disappointed. Even a text or a fb message is better than nothing, but I still raise my brow because it’s low class. I attended a child’s party last week where gifts were not opened, and I haven’t received any acknowledgement of the gift I brought. Lame! XOXO

    Liked by 1 person

  12. A simple ‘thank you’ can go so far, but a lot of people don’t care about these things anymore. It’s a bit sad. As for your friend from #2, she has a record of questionable behavior (ultrasound card, really??), so I guess she’s just narcissistic! Hope you have more, better friends who are compassionate and caring.

    Liked by 1 person

  13. People who don’t send thank yous are so incredibly rude. At a minimum, send an e-mail! Of course a written thank you is much better. And your second friend/acquaintance could do well to develop some tact. Good lord.

    Liked by 1 person

  14. jwhitworth7 says:

    For some reason none of your posts were popping up in my “reader.” So I’m hoping to catch up today! I’m SO with you on thank you cards and the importance of getting them out quickly. And I really cannot believe the woman sent out a message herself about the shower. WTF?! But you are being a model friend by sending gifts….I’m not sure I’d be able to do that.

    Liked by 1 person

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