Emma

I’ve been bored, or rather disinterested, in my own life lately. I’m still waiting for our genetic test results and so there is nothing to speak of with regard to progress in my own personal life. I know I have a lot more to life than these damn reproductive challenges, but it feels like everything at times. Aside from work and The Husband of course. I work, I come home. Go out to dinner, or a movie. All very mundane. The gratitude journal has helped, particularly with my interactions with some people, but I’m not all the way where I want to be yet.

And so, like one of Jane Austen’s heroines,  I’ve meddled. I’m too old for it, and certainly know better, but I fell in the trap and did it anyway.

I guess I’ve become a boring person. I will work on that.

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13 Responses to Emma

  1. It’s so hard to not become boring when dealing with infertility. I know I have as I can’t plan much or drink as much wine as I used to. Trying to change that and find new things to do to keep me occupied as I wait for IVF #2 to start.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. RJ says:

    You said it right…these reproductive challenges DO feel like everything at times. And that frustrates me, as I feel I used to be so much more fun in so many ways. Also, I think as we get older we do get more routine…but not necessarily boring.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Finding fun and enjoyment while waiting is so incredibly hard. Sometimes just living is hard, so being more then mundane is a huge feat. Sending you love my friend.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. KT says:

    I know the feeling. When we were struggling for the last few years I felt like my life was either dealing with a loss, waiting for answers about a loss or waiting to get pregnant. Even though I worked, traveled and did plenty to “stay busy” I feel like looking back those years were a total blur with nothing but fertility issues standing out in my memory. Husband and I became Disney Annual Passholders to force ourselves to have “fun” during that dark time and honestly it was the only way were were able to step out of our funk.

    But at the same time, I also had to tell myself that it was ok to be boring and a little bit sad. You’ve been through a lot and its ok for that to take a toll on you. Hoping you can find some kind of enjoyment while going through all of this : )

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks for your kind words and support. I would love to have a Disney pass, but we live so far away we’d never get our money’s worth. But I do love Disney! I am definitely keeping busy with work and running and yoga but it seems so monotonous. Perhaps I need more variety.
      Thank you for stopping by and commenting. 🙂

      Like

  5. Is there something creative you’ve always wanted to try but never pulled the trigger? While in a difficult job situation I started drawing and painting and I think it’s saved me from “being boring” (at least to myself). The internet is an amazing teacher for anything visual. Hang in there.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Well, lately I’ve been thinking of buying an adult coloring book. I had previously read that the Mandala books were good. I haven’t done that yet though. Maybe it’s time for me to follow through on that! Might help me feel more creative and relieve some stress.

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      • Hi: Wanted to let you know that my art community (Sktchy — it’s an app) has put together an adult coloring book. The black and whites were drawn by Daniel DePeuter and April Henry — two very talented artists. As Sktchy is an app where you can upload photos to be drawn, the pages are all portraits — but there are some really cool backgrounds so it’s a wide variety. If this interests you, you can order by sending an e-mail to thecoloringbookfg@gmail.com

        I think its $25 +$5 shipping. No pressure at all — just wanted you to know about this choice, if you like coloring portraits of people doing amazing things. Hope you’ve found an outlet!

        Liked by 1 person

  6. I’m such a boring person and I hate that I’m often too content with that. I’m trying to find more excitement and get into more hobbies – but sometimes it’s hard to care. We are finally out of an apartment now and into a house so I’m hoping to start a garden this spring. Sending you love ❤

    Liked by 1 person

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