What’s New?

I have come to loathe the question – What’s new?

Nothing. Nothing is new.

As far as most are concerned I am in the same state of affairs I have been in pretty much since I got married. What’s new? “Nothing. It’s really quite boring actually. Work, go to the gym, come home to The Husband, cook dinner, sleep. Lather, rinse, repeat. Just another great sunshine-y day.”

I feel like everyone always expects you to have some great story to share, some great adventure, some wonderful news. Well, I got married (almost) 7 years ago, and my first two attempts at having living children have failed, and I haven’t subsequently been successful at getting pregnant, so that’s where I am. And nobody wants to hear a sob story. There’s nothing new or exciting to report. Yes, I started a new job at a new company three years ago, but that’s old news now.

What’s new? Nothing. My life is stagnant, almost as stagnant as the hot, humid Louisiana Bayou air when we were stuck on the airboat last month.

I know I am a smart, successful woman with a good job. I get it. But sometimes I wonder, what next?

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7 Responses to What’s New?

  1. Oh yea, I totally hate the “whats new?” Conversation piece. I have nothing to offer here either. I have a lot i could say to what I think “is old” though. LOL.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Yup, totally get this! And in a way, I’ve come to hate this question even more now, because everyone seems to expect that we will have been matched for adoption instantly and that we will finally have some news. I feel like now instead of just saying “not much” or “the same old” I’m expected to give some profound update like we are secretly raising our child at home and just didn’t tell anyone the adoption went through. Sorry, this isn’t really the point of your post, and here I am ranting.
    Sending you love my friend.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. lyra211 says:

    I’m sorry. I so recognize this feeling, which is just to say that you’re not alone. I think this is one reason that TTC is so hard — the feeling that everyone else’s life is moving forward while you’re just stuck, month after month after month (and it probably doesn’t help that there’s been a spate of blogger pregnancies — sorry!).

    I’m obviously projecting here, but you must have hit six months by now, or maybe even coming up on a year. I’d think that with your history they’d do an infertility evaluation at six months if you wanted it. Obviously my experience has been really different from yours, but you’ve got enough experience now to know about how long it’s taken you in the past, and if it’s taking you longer this time, combined with everything you’ve been through, maybe it’s time to start thinking about getting evaluated (especially if it’ll make you feel like you’re doing something instead of spinning your wheels, which only you can decide). Anyway, just an idea. I’m sorry you’re going through this. It sucks.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. gsmwc02 says:

    I’m in the same boat you are. It sucks. Wishing things change for you.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. OMG hear, hear!! It always makes me feel like I should be doing something extra-ordinary. why can’t being content in one’s nothing-new-ness be enough?

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Ugh, I hate that question sometimes. You didn’t ask for advice or thoughts, but I did think of something while I was reading your post. When we were in the purgatory between trying and our infertility diagnoses (and waiting to start IVF) and then between our loss and again waiting to start IVF, I had to force myself to make plans to keep moving forward. It wasn’t what I wanted to do, but we booked trips, made plans, signed up for classes, etc. It may not help you, but it did help me. If I couldn’t have a baby, I needed something else to look forward to and to strive for (I am a runner, so I registered for a few races). You may end up cancelling things or changing plans WHEN you get pregnant again, but you’ll be so happy it won’t matter.

    I hope I’m not being offensive in anyway, but just something that helped me when I was feeling like you describe above. I’ve been there and it sucks.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Pingback: Three *** | Sweeping Up the Broken Pieces

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